What About Those Skating Forums?
How do we as skating families deal with skating forums? At their best, they provide a lot of helpful information. At their worst, they’re a bit like the paparazzi of figure skating with a lot of drama and untruths. Of course, skating forums aren’t all the same. Ice-dance.com’s forum tends to be a friendly sharing of information. Figure Skating Universe, on the other hand, can be a mixture of very helpful information and drama-filled mudslinging.
So what do we do about skating forums? As a mother of a senior ice dancer, I’m used to seeing my daughter discussed on various forums. Fortunately, most of the discussion is typically positive regarding her skating. Then again, there can always be competitors’ fans, coaches, or even family members who hope to raise up their skater by cutting down the competition. And there might be a variety of opinions by individuals who follow skating intensely and routinely comment about international competitors. It’s an inevitable part of the sport of figure skating in the 21st Century.
What Do I Do?
Maybe I’m just too curious, but I do read the skating forums. I’m not thick-skinned. I love to read good things about my daughter and am saddened when I read something that isn’t so good. Fortunately, my daughter (and son when he skated competitively) doesn’t have the time or desire to read skating forums. If I think there’s something that will benefit her to hear, I’ll read it to her. Otherwise, I simply keep it to myself.
And that’s where I stop. You won’t find me or my family members anonymously posting on skating forums. I definitely don’t want to be fighting with anyone online, and I simply have an aversion to family members anonymously posting to threads related to their own skaters. We obviously want the best for our skater, so our thoughts aren’t really relevant to an objective discussion anyway. And all skaters deserve to be applauded for the hard work they do and the improvements they make.
The Thumper Theory
Allison Scott, mother of U.S. men’s champion, Jeremy Abbott, has often promoted the “Thumper Theory” from the movie Bambi: “If you can’t say something nice . . . don’t say nothing at all.”
I’m totally in favor of the Thumper Theory. The more we skating families can promote that, the better. Allison wrote a great blog article about it. So what do you think regarding skating families and skating forums? Shouldn’t we all start living the Thumper Theory?
UPDATE: See my latest posts about the Thumper Theory and preventing cyberbullying: Do You Follow the Thumper Theory? and Be Kind Online.
Cate says
Not having kids in figure skating, I didn’t realize that online forums was a facet of that community.
Although – I suppose they are becoming a facet of so much!
Things like that are such a double-edged sword – and it sounds like you have spectacular advice that you take yourself, setting a wonderful example for your kids.
Cate
Deb Chitwood says
Thanks for your kind words, Cate! I think skating forums are one of the most challenging parts of the sport for many families. Even though there are LOTS of wonderful people in figure skating, the negative parts of the sport can make it tough at times. That’s why I always wanted to pass on the Thumper Theory whenever I could.
Cassiopeia says
The anonymous factor of forums seems to give some people permission to say the most hurtful things that (hopefully) they wouldn’t be rude enough to say to your face. That is one of the drawbacks of cyberspace.
Kudos to you for not reading all the garbage to your kids and for not stooping to that level in responding to crazy criticism.
Deb Chitwood says
Thanks, Cassiopeia! I’m hoping that some of the love that goes through the blogging world will start to spread to the anonymous online forums as well. It doesn’t all have to be about competition!
Mandy says
Wow, who knew? I am not in touch with the skating world, so I had no idea there were forums where skaters could be discussed! I’ve learned something new. I do agree with the Thumper Theory and quote it regularly to my children and fully agree that we as adults should practice what we preach!
Deb Chitwood says
Thanks for your comment, Mandy! I love that you quote the Thumper Theory to your children! If children grow up with that philosophy, it’s encouraging to think they should be adding positivity to the online world as they grow up.